General News
13 February, 2025
Personal tragedy inspires fundraiser to support pregnancy and infant loss
Robbie and Sarah Miller raise funds to support parents experiencing infant loss
Horsham couple Robbie and Sarah Miller are finding their way through the grief of losing their baby son Brooks Reggie, with a fundraiser in his honour at the end of February.
The Wimmera Base Hospital, where Brooks was born on October 19 2024, had a Bears of Hope Cuddle Cot, and it was this cot that gave them precious time with their son.
"You can't put a dollar value on the time we had with him," Robbie said.
Cuddle cots maintain the infant's temperature allowing time for parents, family and friends to create memories with the one they won't take home.
Realising not all hospitals have these cots, Robbie will embark on a 24-hour run to raise money for a cuddle cot to be donated wherever it is needed so another family will have one if this tragically happens to them.
Robbie and Sarah had eagerly awaited the birth of their son Brooks; adding to their family was a much-anticipated joy.
Scans just one week before Books was born showed all was well, but within days Sarah felt unwell and a visit to the hospital told a different story.
Brooks would be stillborn at 34 weeks, and they would not be taking him home.
"Until you experience a situation, you have no idea what that grief feels like, and it was like that for us," Robbie said. "We had no idea what this would feel like."
Due to the cuddle cot, they were able to spend valuable time with Brooks.
"We got to meet him, cuddle him and spend time with him and our other children as a family," he said.
My wife is a hero
While the feelings of loss and grief remain for them both, Robbie said he was in awe of his wife Sarah.
"Not only did she have to go through the birth, knowing Brooks had died, but she had our two other children to comfort as well as deal with her own grief and the unique emotions a woman experiences around giving birth.
"She still has her tough times, but she is a hero in my eyes," he said
Robbie said he also experienced emotions new to him.
"To be a husband to a wife that gives birth to a stillborn child creates a whole new level of emotions," he said."
"Sometimes even feelings of guilt crept in."
It helps to celebrate Brooks
People often don't know what to say at times like this, but they want people to know that talking about Brooks helps.
"It's important to keep our 'sleeping babies' in our conversations; it's healthy to love and appreciate them," he said.
"We want to celebrate him.
"Some days are harder than others but the smallest gesture can make a difference."
While navigating their own grief, they had their six-year-old son Gerry and three-year-old daughter Henri to support and help them understand what had happened.
"They watch for the early star to appear at night and say goodnight to Brooks," Robbie said.
"This little action helps them keep his memory alive for them."
People have since shared their experiences with the Miller's; how losing a baby before cuddle cots were available meant they didn't have any time with their baby.
"Even as recently as 20 years ago, people had little or no time with the babies they wouldn't take home," he said.
"We want cots to go wherever they are needed."
Robbie hopes the run will create conversations about stillborn births.
"Nothing can prepare you for watching the funeral home drive away with your baby, while you turn and get in your car to drive home with empty arms," he said.
"You spend months thinking you're preparing to bring a new baby into a loving and caring world!
"Nothing can prepare you for this."
"It's a struggle, but we can't hide from the world so..."
Beginning on February 28 at the Laharum Football and Netball Club at 4 pm, he'll complete the 24-hour run on March 1 at 4pm.
"I'll literally be running in circles," he said.
"I think the run will be physically painful, and I'll have to draw on mental toughness to get through, but at the end of it, I'll know why I did it."
You can sponsor Robbie at $1.00 per kilometre or join him on his run which will end with a bar and meals at the Laharum Football and Netball Club.
"The club has been amazing and we hope people will come along and join us on the day," he said.
"Brooks did not get to walk the earth, but he changed my perspective on life in the brief time he was here," said Robbie.
"And through our experience, he will have an impact on others."
Robbie Miller's gofundme page has already raised $11,830 with Robbie's target of $12,000, it will fund two cuddle cots. https://makeadifference.gofundraise.com.au/